Journal Jar Question
What was the hardest thing in life learned?
Wow, what a question! LOL Since I've been stubborn born and raised all my life there were a lot of lessons taught the hard way, that it is only way I seemed to have learned them. I still have to learn most of my lessons in life the hard way, but at least now that I know that about myself, it makes taking all the lumps a little easier to stomach! LOL
But if I had to chose the one that I feel I learned the most from, was/is that I don't have to give 100% of myself, 100% of the time. That it's all right for me to be selfish sometimes and only expend of myself what I am willing to lose of myself, because in life it's not garanteed that you will always get back what you put out there.
I spent all my Pre-Momma days being much pretty self centered, I was the baby in the family, I pretty much got what I wanted in life as a child and as a young woman, things just went that way for me. It wasn't until I gave birth for the first time that I realized that I was not the center of the universe anymore, that I had just given birth to the center of my universe. I became this person who wanted to make everything good for everyone on this planet and I pretty much became a Yes person instead of the old, "who me?" person.
This not only drained me physically and emotionally, it also took from what was most precious to me..........my family. I over extended myself to others to help them with everything in their life that I was soon neglecting my own and my family, and the sad things is.....when I became the person that needed someone to lean on, no one knew how to deal with me, how could the person who fixed everyone else need to be fixed herself, they weren't ready to see me have a weak moment, so in the end it was only my family that was there for me when I needed to be the one helped.
I don't hold it against the other's (anymore) I learned that they can only give of themselves that they can afford to give to others and I had to adopt that philosophy for myself. It was OK, to say NO.........it was freeing to say...........NO! So learning the perfect balance of giving and holding back had to be the biggest lesson learned for me. Great Question Promise!!!!!
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2 comments:
That's something I have a hard time with too, saying no. Then I begin resentments when it's really my own fault.
Great entry
~ Promise
that is a hard lesson for most of us nurturing types...but you have totake care of yourself first!
i think the hardest lesson for me was that time is finite...if you spend too much time on one thing ,you invariablly have to neglect something else. I used to try to maintain my family, job & an active social life. After I had Caitlin , I had to let the social scene go, & i don't' miss it at all! I have friends that have children too 7 our gatherings revolve around them.
marti
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