Friday, June 30, 2006

Butterfly Kisses and a runny nose

I now I'm going to Jamaica, I know I should be dancing on air.......but I can't get there just yet. As much as I whine and complain about the trials and tribulations of parenting, I'm having a hard time leaving 3 of my children behind (I am not comfortable taking my minor children out of the country right now and lil Jim refuses to fly). In the 20 years I have been with Jim we have been away from our children 4 days......yup just 4 days.....20 years......mind boggling isn't it? Because we were a blended family with two kids at the get go, we married and postponed a honeymoon......then when we added two of "ours" to the mix there wasn't anytime or money or anyone willing to take all 4 of the kids for us to escape.

So now here it is a little more than 24 hours away where Jim and I will board a plane with our oldest child who is to be married on the beach in Jamaica and I am a tear streaked, runny nosed woman.....I can't tell you how many times I welled up with tears today..........I am going to be a runny nosed, mascara mess when Jim meets his baby girl at the end of the aisle to hand her off to her beloved. I am just not ready to "go there' yet. I could be crashing a total strangers wedding and I loose it every time the Father of the Bride sees his baby girl in all her wedding glory! I was robbed of that when my Father passed away when I was just's always over the top emotionally for me, not to mention the Father/Daughter dance!

So here I sit, puffy eyed over the fact that I will be away from 3 of my children while the other one begins a new life, with a new last name........we both cried over that during an hour long telephone conversation yesterday morning. For as long as Jim and I have been married it didn't matter which child was born to which parent my immediate family all had the same last name. We balled so much over that on the phone yesterday she is seriously thinking of keeping our last name and adding a hyphen then her new last name. Who knew this was going to effect me in this way. I asked my own Mom if she felt like she was loosing each of her babies when we all wed our spouses and she said that she did and that this is all normal and what got her through it three times was the fact that we all married our "someone special" who loved us as much as she did and that made it all easier for her.

20 years I have been screaming "Grow and move out already!!" and now they are starting to and stupid, sentimental me wants my babies back!!!! Good Lord if I can't get through the days before the wedding without turning into a weepy mess, how am I going to get through the actually wedding??? Now if I can just get my emotions in check I might be able to enjoy this little time away alone with Jim.

I am such a blubbering idiot right now........which is something I am never comfortable being, especially in public.........I need a hug!

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

It's official...I'm no longer.........

It's official.......I'm no longer allowed in polite society until whatever I am going through runs it's course! My Mother was finished with menopause by the time she was my age, my sister who is a year older then me has been going through it for 18 months I'm guessing this is menopause and I will confirm it with a blood test when I get back from my trip.

Yesterday the DH finally gave in to my pleading about buying some new clothes. I would say we have gone shopping together maybe 2 times in the 20 years we have been together. He hates to shop but this time he made me go with him and like a tired, spoiled brat I whined the whole time......a tantrum thrown by a 43 year old woman is not a pretty sight, but I could not help or stop myself....I am spinning out of control. After all was said and done I have to admit he listened to me this time and pretty much bought everything I liked and didn't buy one single ugly shirt! lol And I have to say he looked HOT in his new style of clothing...........You know you married the right man when every time you see him, you'd hit on him all over again! lol lol lol

We ended the day with a late dinner.....bitchy girl (that's me) wanted steak and the DH took bitchy girl for steak and shrimp. Bitchy girl wanted off the menu the garlic filet mignon medallions with the garlic grilled shrimp, but bitchy girl didn't want all that minced garlic on top, so bitchy girl asked politely if they could make the dish without adding all the minced garlic on top (I'm talking about a tablespoon of minced garlic added as a garnish on top) It's not as if I needed to keep werewolves away or anything....I just didn't want to taste that dinner for the next few days.........bitchy girl also ordered a margarita on the rocks to take off "the edge" or "The chip" on my shoulders I was carrying around with me for the last few weeks.

I was quite calm by the time they started serving....that is until I saw all the minced garlic all over my food, that I specifically asked not to be there........mistake number one right?? Oh mistake number two came right after that..........when I pointed it out to the waiter and without a blink of an eye he said, "Well, you can just scrape it off right?" where as the other Kim would of said, "couldn't you just take it back and have them make me a new order without the garlic like I asked?" But NOOOOOO bitchy girl said (without a blinkof an eye) "Well, can't you just stick it up your ass?? minced garlic and all??"..........OHHHH bad form bitchy girl!!!!!

Needless to say I am taking myself out of polite society until I land in Jamaica and let the beauty of the island sooth the savage beast that has taken over me........Jim said something like, "If you keep this up you will be spending the whole time Hannibal Lector style.......straight jacket, lovely leather face mask and on a dolly!"      OHHHHH MY BAD!!!!!  lol


Bleckkkkk!  The tan lines???? lol lol lol

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

If this is menopause......shoot me now!!!

Ok, I have no idea what is the matter with me.........I'm having a mood swing three minutes apart! I can be content and happy one minute and then either spiting fire or weeping like a willow the next. Most of the time I have this anxious I'm about to bolt any minute. Is this pre trip jitters? Daughters wedding jitters? Peri-menopause jitters?? What ever it is I HATE not being in control of my emotions. I think my youngest daughter even called in reinforcements when she called my sister the other day to find out how to get some one committed?? I'm thinking she was thinking about ME!!!!! :)

My middle daughter called me this morning to let me know her and her live in boyfriend called it quits and he moved out.(the boyfriend that was diagnosed with schizophrenia over the Christmas holidays last year) This was what was best for the both of them. He had stopped taking his meds, was fired from his job and was treating her terribly. He's a great young man but not what any Mother would want for her 20 year old daughter to spend the rest of her life with. His parents took him home and had him re-evaluated again and the second Doctor did not agree with the diagnose of schizophrenia. He feels W exhibits more bipolar tendencies, so he started him on a new battery of meds. He went from being a very chatty, carefree young man to a very quiet and brooding young man. My daughter now realizes she lost him a long time ago and it was best for both of them to move on. I am at peace with her decision and so is she and that is always the sign of a right decision.

I have been shopping like crazy getting ready for Jamaica and I am at peace with the whole insane 1st wife, 2nd wife thing and I finally got to meet my future SIL's Father and he is a great guy! I spent sometime with the SIL's Mom and even though it was only the second time we saw each other, we both felt the need to hug (another good sign) I think me and her are going to hit it off just fine....she seems to have a hidden rowdy side to her that I am going to try and bring out in Jamaica. We already made dinner plans with my future SIL parents when we get back from Jamaica and things settle down a bit. My SIL's Dad is an "old wild child all grown up" kinda person like me so we hit it off really good too! Now if I can just get through not wanting to throttle the SIL's Sister in Jamaica (I'm sorry but she is a total bitch!) this will be a great escape from my STAY AT HOME MOM routine to my tropical island retreat! My daughter almost threw her future SIL out of the wedding shower Saturday.....that should tell you how much trouble this woman is!

Well, I have a million things to do and as usual blogging through this has helped me get passed it all so I am off to try and put some killer outfits together for my trip! My camera is acting up too and I will not go to Jamaica without a digital camera!!!! Grrrrrrrr!

Until next time...........

Crazy menopausal woman.......out!

Monday, June 26, 2006

Monday Morning Question.....

Sometimes I Think
Subject: Monday Morning Question
Author: fisherkristina
Monday Morning Question:

Describe a "sound" from your childhood.  What was it?  When did you hear it?  What does it bring to mind?


Trains! Because of this I love trains.......there was a train yard maybe less than a half m from the house I lived in from 4 years of age to 10. Back then we didn't have central air conditioning or even window units for that matter so in warm weather we slept with the windows wide open and all night long I would hear the trains clicking away on the tracks and the sound of the brakes as they came to a stop in the train yard. It has a unique sound.....almost like a high pitch of a tin whistle in a few different octaves. To this day I still love that sound......warm fuzzy feelings of being a carefree child playing hide and seek with all the neighborhood children as the Moms sat on the front stoops every night going over their days and it was safe to play well after the street lights came on.

The next house we owned had railroad tracks less than two blocks away, and even though trains never stopped there with their squeaky brakes I could hear the clackety clack of the trains rush by. That is also where I spent the majority of my TWEEN years, exploring viaducts, pulling apart Chinese puzzle sticks and cat tails and looking for tadpoles in the little creaks that ran through between the freight train tracks and the passenger train tracks. TOO many times we had very close calls with those trains while trying to beat them through the concrete tunnels or over passes.

It was our secret meeting places where we all smoked our cigarettes and wrote our names inside of hearts with who ever our crushes were at the time. Some times we were chased after by the private security guys or the homeless people who road the rails. I remember we once came across a rather large pot field and thought we would claim it as our own.....we did until the cops found it and burnt it to the ground. We weren't half afraid of the cops as we were if we ever were caught by the original pot field owner.

So its the sound of the trains brakes and train whistles and the clackety clack that will forever be tied to the sounds of my youth. Thanks Kristina for bringing it all back to me.........happy place for sure!

Friday, June 23, 2006

Me.....AL LA 1983?


I was probably around 20 years old in this photo.......the same age as my middle daughter is now (Amanda) seems like yesterday until I realize in that photo I was wearing a size 3 Levi's! I know I wasn't 21 yet because this photo was taken in a bar in Downtown Chicago called O'Sullivans and my girlfriends sisters R&B band used to have a gig there every weekend, and every weekend us almost 21 something year old's used to be able to get in, drink, dance and do it all over again the next night.

It was at this time that I honed my music tastes....I fell in love with the blues, it is still my favorite music and I can't help but 'move' to it when I listen to it now......"Sweet Home Chicago" they have a blues fest every year and every year I say I am going, but now that I am even farther away from the city and still feeling the 'burn out' from hanging out there in my youth, I have to admit I like the quiet suburban life. I have lived off and on in Chicago since I was 4 years old and I have still yet to go to the "Taste of Chicago." Downtown doesn't have the pull over me as much as it did say 25 years ago and Rush Street and Division (Chicago's night time hot spots) was were I spent my entire 21 year daring every bouncer I came across to go ahead and card me! No more fake ID's for me I was 21 and having the time of my life! What I wouldn't do just to have that kind of energy again.........sigh.....but then again I wasn't this content with my life as I am now....but to be able to dance the night away, night after night and to not have to pay for it the next day......ahhhhhhh youth and the endless energy that goes along with it.

I think the reason for all this melancholy is that Melissa is getting married and on the brink of starting her adult life.....she's 23, getting married, already a homeowner and talking about starting a family.......that is when time escapes you. The baby seems like a baby for so long and then at the speed of light, they are all grown up and living their own lives. Where did all that time go?

 I think I am 'stuck' in that in between stage.....the one where half the time you want them to be all grown up and ontheir own and the other half wishes they were still adorable little babies smelling like "No More Tears" and "Baby Magic" all over again. I know once I do become a (gulp) Grandmother I will get the best of both children and their babies to spoil rotten and then send them home!

I look at that picture above and remember that I didn't have a care in the world, I spent that time in my life flying back and forth from Chicago (were my family was) and New York (where I lived with my boyfriend at the time) and Daytona (where we spent 5 months of winter every year because we both hated snow) at that time I had no idea that my life was going to be any different than it was then. That boyfriend was not my forever love, my forever love was waiting for me when I came back ...along with the path that led me to my life that I am living now......I don't care what you call it...fate, destiny, God's plan............I am where I should be and I am blessed......but DAMN IT I wanna fit in those damn jeans again!!!!!! lol lol lol

I am so on my way!!!!!! Ü

Thursday, June 22, 2006

Crashed and Burned.....good thing I bounce back quick huh?

Ok, I finally have crashed and burned. The stress of everything has caught up to me, Our oldest daughters wedding is less than two weeks away, the trip is booked, the limo to the airport is arranged, I dealt with the insane 1st wife (still more to come), I have scrubbed, polished and/or threw out the stuff in my house I have been meaning to do for the past year and the In-laws arrived late yesterday afternoon. With everything that has been going on my immune system took a beating and I ended up calling the Doctor. I love my Doctor, I have been with this practice for 14 years now, they know me and they know that I know myself and how my body works.

Stress will someday be my body turns on me when my stress level is high, I will usually have a few seizures brought on by powerful migraines, usually after a few bad seizures my short term memory gets shot, the joints in my body will become painful to the point that it hurts to walk let alone use my hands....I need to get calm and stay calm, I am hoping that calm will reach me after the ceremony on the beach, in Jamaica. The doctor gave me a prescription of xanax to get me through the upcoming being confined on an air plane in close proximity of the DH 1st wife. That one little pill will be what prevents me from getting up close and personal with her and the air marshal! lol lol lol

4.5 hour on the plane with her, then say another..7 hours for the wedding and the ceremony and everything will be right in my world once again......well up until the day after we get back and I have to load up the truck and take the last two remaining children living at home on a road trip south for the DH's annual family reunion....Ok so after a week at the In-laws and the road trip back, I will be able to relax....hmmmm I wonder if they Doctor will give me more xanax for that??? lol lol lol Couldn't hurt to ask right??? I think after all this vacation I am going to need to take a vacation on my own.....anybody got a spare room? Let's just say for maybe 2 weeks or so??? And can I bring my pooch?? lol lol lol

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

So it wasn't in one ear and out the other after all! lol

Just when you start to question your parenting skills, something happens and let's you know everything is going to be just fine! My son Jimmy (14 yrs old) found the new neighbors IPOD laying out in the grass, and even though a thunderstorm is rolling in, he ran to the neighbors house to see if it was indeed their IPOD and returned it. I'm wondering how many teenage boys would be honest enough to return an "expensive must have" back to its rightful owner.

The new neighbor's 17 year old son was thankful to have his tunes back and for Jimmy's honesty. The neighbor boy gave him $10.00 for returning the IPOD. Two teenage boys, doing the right thing on their own accord........I know two Mother's who are patting themselves on their own backs about now! ;)

Monday, June 19, 2006

"Borrowed" from Ashlee! ;)

43 of the MOST random questions...Stolen or borrowed from Ashlee's  blog lol ;) depends on how you look at it! lol lol lol

1. Where were you 1 hour ago?
on my knees.................washing the kitchen floor, GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER WILL YA! lol lol lol

2. Who will be your next kiss?
Probably my Dog.....Boo he has the cutest little kissy face! lol Then Jim lmaoooooo

3. Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?
yup, me I never tan I just turn pink, then peel, then freckle...... damn my Irish Blood!

4. When is the last time you went to the mall?
Friday Morning.......still looking for vacation clothes!

5. Are you wearing socks right now?
Only in the winter time otherwise I'm a barefoot kinda girl ;)

6. When was the last time you went out of town?
This past winter, we went north to snow ski..........I just fall over a lot.

7. Have you been to the movies in the last 5 days?

8. What was the last thing you had to drink?
COLD WATER! Delishhhhh!

9. What are you wearing right now?
Capri jeans and some funky old cleaning shirt

10. Have you been in a car wash?

11. Last fast food you ate?
Italian submarine sandwich made by moi!

12. Where were you last week on Saturday?
Out at the lake

13. Have you bought any clothing items in the last week?
Yup! Capri's, tank tops and sandals

14. When was the last time you ran?
Probably the last time there was a shoe sale ;)

15. What's the last sporting event you watched?
Is fishing really a sport???

16. What is your favorite class?

17. Your dream vacation?
Anywhere alone with Jim, just give me 5 days, that's all I ask

18. Last 3 people's houses you were in?
My Sisters House, My clients house and the trap house out at the lake, that counts don't it??

19. How old are your parents?
My Mom is 69, my Dad died at 41

21. Do you miss anyone?
I miss the younger version of me at this a mid life crisis????

22. Last play you saw?
La Cage AU Faux.......... 1988??? (I'm sure I didn't spell that right! lol)

23. What are your plans for today?
More grunge work, the In-Laws are coming in 2 me!

24. Who is the last person you commented on myspace?

25. Ever go to camp?

26. Were you an honor roll student in school?
when I was a wee little child.....I think 3rd grade maybe

27. What do you want to know about the future?
When the last little one leaves the nest is it permanent?? lol

28. Are you wearing any perfume or cologne?
Ummmmmm, I'm wearing bleach!!!! according to my MIL,"If your not cleaning with bleach then you aren't cleaning!"

31. Do you have a tan?
more like a lot of freckles! lol

32. How old do you want to be when you have kids? 
been there, done that, no more thank you!

33. Do you collect anything?
black amethyst and diamonds! ;)

34. Last time you got stopped by a cop or pulled over?
2003, that was the last time I tried red hair! ;)

35. Have you ever drank your soda from a straw?
Uh, yes.

36. How do you like your drinks?
Over crushed ice.

37. Do you like hot sauce?

38. Last time you took a shower?
Last night

39. Who do you have a crush on?
my DH now and forever......hey! he's still hot! lol lol lol

40. What is your mood?
apprehension......for many reasons

41. Are you someone's best friend?
Jim's of course, even if I don't bait my own hooks right honey???

42.Are you rich?
no, but I've been called something that rhymes with rich! lol

43. What do you think of the person who took this survey before you?
I think she's adorable!

Thursday, June 15, 2006

Worth Repeating........

Funny how things are sometimes huh?

Its the single person who sometimes wonders what it would feel like to be married, while the ones who are married sometimes wonder what it would feel like to be single again.

It's the couple who's married and a lil overwhelmed with children who reminisce about the easier, less stressful days before the children came along. And it's the married couple who has yet to experience parenthood who look at couples with kids and thinks someday I hope to be that lucky to have a family of my own!

It's the person who thinks it would be great to be my own boss, that way at work there won't be anyone telling them how to do things and  then there is the person who owns the company who says, "Gee wouldn't it be nice to be able to pass along all the problems and just punch out on the time clock!"

Its the young couple in new love who looks at the couple that have been together for decades and decades and thinks they can only hope for a love that old and the older couple that glances at the young couple and sighs and says....."Young love, wasn't it grand!"

It's the Mother who's children who have grown and left the nest that looks at a the Mother with small children and secretely wishes hers were still that young and the Mother of the young children who is looking back at the other woman with a tinge of jealousy wondering how wonderful it must feel having that kind of freedom again! 

It's the person who feels trapped in an apartment who longs for a place of their own and then there is the home owner who wishes they had a landlord to take on all the burdens of owning the home.

It's the tall person who wishes they were just a lil shorter and the shorter person who wishes they were just a lil taller, it's the brunette who wonders what it's like to be a blonde and it's the blonde who would kill for a shade in brunette or red or even black. It's the blue eyed person who wishes they had big soft brown eyes and it's the brown eye person who wishes for the baby blues.

I think everybody at some point in their life has wished for something different, It's only natural to do so.........BUT you also have to be able to see what you DO have and find peace with that, But most of all be thankful for the things you have been blessed with.........Still I wish I was a lil taller! lol lol lol

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Ever notice......

How more patient we are with other people's children and spouses? Or how much more accommodating we are with them? I'm guilty as charged in behaving this way too! Maybe because it's that old saying, "Familiarity breeds contempt." It's not that we don't love our own children and spouses because we know we do, I think it's because we were raised to be polite and we aren't always polite to the people we spend the most time with, like our own Husbands, Wives and children.

Case in point....this past weekend while out at the lake a girlfriend of mine who was participating in the catfish tournament, snagged her line out in the weeds, not only did my Husband and another friends Husband go to her rescue, they actually dragged one of the boats out and took her and her snagged fishing pole out closer to the snag as to not snap her line while trying to un snag it for her. Now me and the other Wife (the one whose DH is out helping the snagged girlfriend) are sitting there quite amused at how "helpful" and "polite" our DH's are being. If it was one of us it would of gone down more like something along these lines......"Kim, What do you mean you snagged your line? Didn't you see the weeds? Do you know how long I've had that lure Kim? and now it's gone?" Do you think he would of taken me out on the boat to un snag MY line? And if he did would he have been so quiet and polite about it?? I'm thinking NOPE! There would of been plenty of heated words and glances and I would of been told yet again, this is why he likes to go out fishing with his buddies, THEY bait their own hooks......THEY take their own catch off the hook........THEY un snag and un tangle their own messes! ( I know at least a few of you are sitting there reading this and shaking your head yes!!!! lol)

Now this little theory of mine works in my favor too! All the other Husbands are more attentive to me when I need something, My BIL (sisters DH) will drop everything and come over when I need something looked at in my home (My DH isn't as.... let's say "GIFTED" carpentry wise as by BIL) but my own Sister is still waiting for her DH to finish the downstairs family room bathroom (waiting 4+ years so far! lol) And I know that I can call any other of the DH'S on the nextel two way while they are out on a store run and ask for them to pick me up something I forgot and I will always be told "No Problem!" I can also ask any of the other children not born to me, to do a quick favor and NOT get the eye roll! lol lol lol

Just for "chits and giggles" I am going to moderate and modify my own behavior over the next week or so and see maybe if I start treating my DH and Children with more patience and gratitude, that I might reap the benefits of reciprocation..........I won't be holding my breath mind you, but I will be keeping mental notes.

Don't ya find human behavior soooo fascinating?? lol lol lol

Monday, June 12, 2006

Out of the mouths of babes

Usually, when you least expect it, you hear a 'pearl' come out of the mouths of one of your babes! And when it secretly scream "YES!" inside your own head!! We all have our BAD family traits that are either knowingly passed down from one generation to the next and sometimes it is unknowingly passed down through observations or lack of someone trying to correct it. To counter balance any negative influence from previous generations, all it takes is for someone to break the cycle.

I have broken a few family cycles, I come from a long line of alcoholics and lets face it, not a lot of good choices come from those who abuse alcohol among other things. At least with my family most other bad habits can be traced back to the alcohol addiction, physical abuse, mental abuse and infidelity, most were visited upon during an alcoholic induced haze, I also believe the intent and capability to do so has to be in there too somewhere.

My Mother was the first to make a change in her family line ( she doesn't even qualify as a social drinker), both her parents were stay at home alcoholics, My Father and his side of the family drank here, there and everywhere. Out of my Parents three children, two know when to stop (total social drinkers) the other has to drink to be social.

Another cycle I was able to break was racism, I don't allow it in my home or around my children and I am not quiet about it when it is displayed around my children. I teach tolerance of all cultures in my home and I am very proud to say my children preach tolerance too! A few weeks ago while out with a crowd, the old "Those people" isms started, I was quiet about it for maybe a minute then I stated my usual mantra about it "Since I am trying to raise my children to be tolerant of all cultures, I would appreciate it if you would not use "Those Terms" in front of my children." Since that basically shocks people into a stunned silence for a few minutes because one, they are used to speaking that way, and two, they are very used to people who share my view not speaking up about it. Sometimes a get an icy glare shot my way, as if I was the one insulting them, but most times I get an apology and we go about our merriment with mutual respect on both of our parts.

So on this same occasion, the same offender who was drinking quite heavily at this point either ignored my request or in a drunken stupor forgot my request and continued and it was at this time that my now 15 year old daughter said to this person, "So, how would you like it if I didn't like you just because your racist??" and then she walked away from this person. I was very proud of that little girl of mine and I have to say she definitely inherited her Momma's Moxy! lol lol lol

Everyone is entitled to their own beliefs, what they are not entitled to do is force their beliefs on other people, this world is a big enough place for everyone, IF everyone can learn a little respect for other people's beliefs and cultures in a respectful manner...... I am not niave, I know we don't live in a perfect world but for a moment, at least my world was perfect!

Saturday, June 10, 2006

So, How's your Karma?

I have never been a "Why Me?" person.......when something happened I always knew the "why" part. Playing the "Victim" role was something I never did. Usually when "Murphy's Law" happened it was because of a mistake or a lack of action on my part before it happened. Knowing this early in my life kept me from becoming one of those "Why Me?" kind of people. I usually always say to myself when a known "Why Me?" person starts their whining "I'll tell ya why you!!!!" Sometimes I share it sometimes I keep it too myself, usually when I share it they end up agreeing with me! lol lol lol

I never question when good karma smiles down on me too....I try to live my life doing the right thing every day, I try to always put out good, knowing good will come back to me and usually when bad karma comes back and bites me in the ass, I KNOW the reason why.......I never question with a "Why Me"

I do get sometimes annoyed with people in my life who "whine" about the good luck and good fortune that has smiled down on me most my life, like I shouldn't receive it. I get asked if I have a "Horseshoe up my ass?" all the time....I answer with a no, it's more like a shamrock tattooed on my ass that helps (My Bad!) Or how lucky I am, how if there is something to "WIN" and I am involved in it, I usually win....nothing major, but always more sour grapes from those who didn't win.

I go out of my way to be polite and friendly to pretty much everyone I meet, I let cars turn in front of me (when I'm not the one in the hurry) I let people get in the grocery line when they have way less things than I do, no big deal. I smile at everyone who makes eye contact with me, I don't lie, steal or cheat....I ALWAYS point out the case of soda or water UNDER my cart, when I get over paid in change, I point it out to the cashier, I hold the door for those that need the door held open to them, I don't litter. I never "see a penny pick it up and all day long you'll have good luck" I leave those for those who need their wishes if it's a $20 or something my philosophy is every woman for herself!!!! lol lol lol

I truly believe you get back what you put out in put out good and/or positive and that will come back to you, you put out bad and/or negative and that is what you get back, usually that is how the "Why Me?" can get traced back to you.

Life is good and I am blessed.......I try to remember that everyday, I try to take nothing for grant it, and when I find that I have, I will make up for it.......I'm humane and I make mistakes, it's accounting for those mistakes that separates the "Why Me's?" of the world from the ones that take their "lumps" quietly and gracefully as they come along in life.

Friday, June 9, 2006

Who Me???

The only thing worse than being difficult, unreasonable, obstinate and a total SPOILED ROTTEN BRAT is knowing you are behaving this way, knowing that it is WRONG, but unable to change a damn thing about it!!!! Well, at least I'm honest about it right???? ;)

Someday......Someone..... will nominate my Darling Husband for Sainthood, in the meantime, please keep him in your prayers! lol lol lol

Wednesday, June 7, 2006

Yes! I am whining (again) It's my blog! So there!! lol

A few things I gotta do that I really don't wanna do


Work out.......just finished my second month of the Monday, Wednesday Friday's Wednesday and I don't wanna go! Today is weigh in and measure day, since I don't own a scale, since they haven't been a good friend to me in years, I have to go and face the numbers. So far I've lost 5 pounds and a total of 9 come I have to work so much harder taking it all off then I ever did putting it on? Kinda hard to still call it baby weight, since the baby is 14 years old, denial is a very powerful tool! lol lol lol


Get my home ready for the MIL inspection.......I have 2 weeks to complete this task, I need 4 weeks, but even if I had 52 weeks, it would never muster up to her idea of clean compared to my idea of clean. If it isn't smelling of bleach than it ain't clean! My dog didn't take kindly to being bleached the last time she "visited"


 He used to be bigger and black! Just kidding!!!!



Today is the first day of summer vacation.........nuff said!!!!!!!!


Still not looking forward to the plane ride with the crazy 1st wife all the way to Jamaica (Less than a month) can you say "Air Marshall?" I think in all of my entries on the "2nd Wives Club" series I might have forgotten how she and I ended that last remember the one, "For Melissa's sake, can we please put this all behind us" conversation??" This woman said to me, "The reason that I think we have never got along was that we are so much alike!" ( Ok deep breaths everyone........DEEP......BREATHS!) where I answered to that with, "You and I are NOTHING alike! And the reason we never got along was we ARE (not were, ARE) in love with the same man!" where as she quickly agreed and that was the end of that conversation!

Tuesday, June 6, 2006

Dial M for............

 For johnmscalzi Monday Photo Shoot..............

"M" is for Morning Bird......the ones I used to try to get home before their first chirp in my wild, younger days.....I lost that race most mornings! lol lol lol


kmh 2006


Well, alrighty then!

I was talking to the children recently, they were all coming to realize I was not as psycho as most of their friends Mothers........I was thinking this was a good revelation. So then that got us onto the subject of TV Mothers and who was a most like. I'm still kinda on the fence on thinking if this was a good thing or a bad thing, but here

Between the four of those little darlings, I have the same traits as

Marge Simpson and Lois Malcolm of "The Simpsons" fame and "Malcolm in the Middle fame"............THANKS! Lil Jimmy ( I see therapy in his future! lol)

And what did my 3 lovely daughters have to add to this?? I am a cross between Peg Bundy, Roseanne Barr and Lucy of the "I love Lucy" fame ( I see therapy in my future! lol)

Well, if I am the one who raised them and they are in charge of raising my future grandbabies..........God help us all!!! lol lol lol

Monday, June 5, 2006

What were you doing in 1984?

Question of Day....How old were you the summer of  "84"? (stole this from yet another journal! lol)

In 1984 I was 20, I had the world on a string and I knew it! I was flying back and forth between Chicago and New York where in NY I was playing house and living a very cushy life and when I was back in Chicago I was able to be the woman/child that I still was.

I was using my older sisters ID so I could get into the bars without having to worry about 'raids' I was out dancing to "Hey Little Sister, what have you done?" and dressing up in my retro 1940's wardrobe. I refused to see the latest horror movie "Nightmare of Elm Street" and was into answering my phone "Ghost Busters, What do you want?"

Just a few interesting facts on what was "hot" back then

Hit Songs of 1984

1. "Owner of a Lonely Heart" ... Yes (What lonely heart?)
2. "Karma Chamelon" ... Culture Club (Boy George did his make up better than I could do mine!) lol
3. "Jump" ... Van Halen (Back when David Lee Roth was hot!!!)
4. "Footloose" ... Kenny Loggins (played at every dance club)
5. "Against All Odds" ... Phil Collins (was missin ghis Genesis Days)
6. "Hello" ... Lionel Richie (always made me sad)
7. " Let's Hear It For the Boy" ... Deniece Williams (Best song to sing along to while dancing!!)
8. "Time After Time" ... Cindy Lauper (Showed her deeper side)
9. "The Reflex" ... Duran Duran (Major crush on bass player...well, I think he played bass!)
10. "When Doves Cry" ... Prince (Another club favorite!)

Top Ten Movies

1. Beverly Hills Cop (Loved Eddy Murphy!!!)
2. Footloose (Sound track was better than the movie)
3. Ghostbusters (SNL spin offs........loved those guys!)
4. Gremlins (walked out of this movie.....blodd, guts ..... no thanks!)
5. Greystoke (Didn't see)
6. The Legend of Tarzan, Lord of the Apes (Didn't see)
7. Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (back when Harrison Ford was young and HOT!!!)
8. The Karate Kid  (Wax on/Wax off)
9. The Natural (didn't see)
10. Police Academy (didn't see)

I think the most used phrases out of my mouth that year were.......

Do these pants make my butt look big?? ( I was a size 3 as if?)

How's my hair? (much bigger than my butt! lmaoooo)

Where we going tonight???

Ahhhhhhhh Good times! lol lol lol

Sunday, June 4, 2006

Life as a wedding crasher! lol lol lol

I had the best time yesterday! There was a wedding on the beach out at the lake and we crashed it! And when I'm talking about we, there had to be 15 of us!!!! They had karaoke instead of a band or DJ and of course being the stage mother in training that I am becoming, I signed up baby girl, Rachel to sing.......we thought for sure they were going to ask us to leave after that, but they loved her and she was a big hit and they asked us all to stay and share in the open bar and to let my baby girl sing all she wanted!!!! After hearing a few of their guests singing themselves I can totally understand why they wanted baby girl to sing!

They had a guy there who was awesome, he sang everything from Bon Jovi to Bob Segar and there was a woman there who did a mean Proud Mary and Bobby about an aerobic workout, ever try dancing in the sand?? Kicked off my shoes and danced, danced, danced!!! We came home a lil after midnight and let me tell you this Cinderella was pooped!!! I actually slept until 9:30 this morning!!! I haven't slept that late in I don't know how long! When I woke up Jim was already back out on the lake, gotta love the nextel two way........."Jim, Come and take me out to breakfast please???" I thought we would of been able to sneak away without the 2 younger kids but as soon as lil Jimmy heard "breakfast" he was out of his teenager coma and ready to go with us.

Then Melissa and Tony came out for a little bit to see if they maybe wanted to have their after the wedding party out on the beach too, but Melissa said it was a little too Redneck for her!!! Kids.....they don't realize until later in life that if your with good friends and family you can have a good time anywhere you're at, it doesn't matter the surroundings!!! lol lol lol

Well, I hope everyone else had a fantastic weekend too! Friday night was a quiet night out at the lake, today was a boat auction and then the guys played a few rounds of "Bow darts" It's similar to darts like you play at a bar, but the target is bigger to accommodate using bow and arrows. I can't even pull my son bow back so I would be dangerous even attempting to play that game...Hell, I'm dangerous with the bean bag game as it is!

Until next time.........

Friday, June 2, 2006

Weekend Assignment #114

Weekend Assignment #114: Things You Like Now But Not Then

As we go on in life, we find things we didn't like when we young we develop an affinity for as we get older. With that in mind, here's your Weekend Assignment:

Weekend Assignment #114: Name a thing you like today, that your younger self would probably roll his or her eyes at. People, places, things, ideas, philosophies -- all of it is up for consideration.

Extra Credit: Name something you didn't like then that you still don't like now.


Ok, I'm gonna have to go with Middle aged, 40 something year old men with thinning hair and a thickening in the waisteline! LOL! LOL! LOL!

Now that I'm a 40 something year old woman myself I now find some of them to be hot! Expecially my Husband!


Who loves ya baby???...................ME!!!!!!!


Well, I still think he's hot!!


Other Middle aged men who I think are hot........

Bruce Willis (now he made bald sexy to me! lol)

Nicholas Cage (and I have no idea why?? lol)

George Clooney (Who gets hotter with every year!)

Andrew McCarthy ( Loved him since the 80's!)

Just to name a few!

To see more of other Bloggers choices please visit John Scalzi's blog over at ....... link ~~~~> johnmscalzi

100 25

I have lived in 5 states and on 2 Continents

I have visited 23 states (so far)

I have seen a tornado up close and personal

I have experienced an earthquake

I love lemon scented candles.......real lemon not like furniture polish lemon lol....who wants to be reminded of house cleaning!

I cry every time I hear TAPS

I cry at Weddings (always when the Dad is walking the bride down the aisle and then again at the Father, Daughter dance....I'm such a baby! 


I cry at's always harder for those left behind, I don't handle death very well, but then again who does?

I'm a fantastic cook when I wanna be ;)

I wish I could paint or sketch for that matter

I had an awful childhood but I always knew I was loved

I used to be able to ice skate, roller skate and hula I can't do any of them

I'm a romantic at heart

I love to watch my Husband while he sleeps

I love puppy breath!!!!!

I was able to stay home and raise my last two children from birth

I was only un pregnant 7 weeks between Rachel and Lil Jimmy .......... YIKES!

I love looking for antiques, I love to touch things that have stories to tell


Nothing jolts my senses more than a good smelling man! Jim wore Aramis when we first started dating and he can take me back to those early, wild days when he wears it to this day! He doesn't wear cologne everyday anymore (only when we need to clean up good! lol), but boy.....when that man does wear it, I am all over him!!!! MY BAD!!!!!


I change my perfume to fit my moods........Chanel No. 5, Cool Water, Ralph Lauren "Blue" and my staple since High School "Halston" for women


I HATE litter bugs......Yes I am the one that gives you the evil eye when you flick your cigarettes out your car window! lol


I recycle everything I can


I hate chain letters and email forwards


I try to look at everything from both sides before I make a judgment call

I believe everyone comes into your life for a reason, either to teach you something or to be taught by you.


That's it! That is 100 things about me that you probably didn't already know, I can't remember who's journal I originally saw this done it but I realized immediately that I learned more about them in 100 sentences that I did reading their journals than I would have if I read their journals from first entry to last........If you decide to do one in your own journal please return to mine and share the link!

Mini Me turns 15!


She is the most like me.........she scares me because of this! Rachel was the quiet child, didn't need a lot of supervision, didn't need a lot of discipline......But, I always knew she would be the one we had to "Worry" about later!

She turned 15 today.........happy tears Momma, happy tears!

Below is an entry on how much this child is loved, it was part 3 of a 4 part series on "Our Children" This is who she is..................

This is my Daughter...My song bird

This is the first child created by "our love," she is our song bird. She is the first of "Ours" in the "Yours, Mine and Ours" kind of love story.  I couldn't wait to give birth to her! I wanted to know everything about her. Who's eye's she was going to have, who's nose, I wanted to hear her laughter.

Even though her delivery came two weeks later than she was expected, she was a lil bitty thing. She weight 5 lbs 7 oz and the doctor exclaimed,"She nothing but eye balls and eye lashes!" She entered this world calmly and full of wonder and she has remained that way. She didn't close her eyes for sleep until hours after she was born, she was too busy experiencing life.

This child loved music from the beginning, she very rarely had a bad day even as a baby, always happy, always smiling and when she did have a bad day, music soothed her. She sang melody's before she could even speak. At 13, She can stun an audience to silence within the first few bars of a song.  She has the soul of a woman who has lived a thousand years.  Many people turn to me when she's singing with their mouths opened and they point to the goosebumps on their skin.  She has been compared to Patsy Cline, Leanne Rimes, Brenda Lee and Whitney Houston, you can't get better than that!

I often felt that she was robbed of my time, I gave birth to her baby brother just short of 11 months after her birth. I now had "Irish Twins" She was a very gracious older sister and didn't seem to bother sharing me with her younger brother, but I wish I had more time with just her. Her older Sisters who were now 5 and 9 were perfectly happy about being the only children, but they adjusted as usual, they thought we really must have lost our minds when we announced we were expecting again. I believe their exact words were,"WHY?" and "ARE YOU CRAZY, YOU JUST HAD A BABY!" We had enough love to share with them all.

This daughter of mine, this song bird is a true Gemini, for although she is a sweet and gentle child, she is the quickest to temper. She definitely inherited my fire! She hates injustice and always fights for the underdog.  She is the keeper of all animals, she wants to save everything and everybody, she has big love.

She is the one who reminds me to see with a child's eye, where everything has infinite beauty.

Thursday, June 1, 2006

100 things....50-75

I like my steak medium rare and my eggs over easy

I love the scent of lilacs

I prefer Spring over all the other seasons

I have family photographs in every room of my house

I used to be afraid of cruise ships but I have no problem flying! lol lol lol

My first car was a Toyota Celica

The first car I bought myself was a baby blue camaro

I love hot and spicy food....the hotter the better

I am addicted to IHOP's butter pecan syrup

I love all kinds of music....from Rap to Bluegrass

I believe in spirituality but do not agree with organized religion

My ideal man beside the DH of course would have to be Sam Elliot! I fell in love with him in the Movie "Mask" with Cher..I loved the way he walked, I loved the way he talked, I loved the way he looked at's the same way Jim still looks at me after all these years!

I have seen every Bette Midler movie........I love her!

I have kept every card Jim has ever given me (and he has kept mine!)

We eloped...the marriage counts not the wedding! ;)

I drink my coffee and hot tea with extra sugar.

My nextel is rarely ever off....I want me kids to be able to reach me when ever they need to reach or night!

My house can't run properly without paper towels and bottled water

I'm a messy housekeeper......I can co exist with a few dust bunnies happily

I prefer Comedies....not into all the blood and gore kinda stuff

I like my movie popcorn with extra butter and a box of raisonettes thrown in.......and this is not a craving! lol

I didn't have an imaginary friend when I was little, but I believed I could fly but only at night....I remember I had a lot of dreams about flying through the neighborhood while everyone else slept

I love chocolate chip cookies either right out of the oven or right out of the mixing bowl

I had no fear as a child, but the older I get the more I worry about healing time!! lol lol

I prefer neutral, solid colors in my home and with what I wear.....I don't own too many clothes with prints

Do Over Day??

Ok, Dropped one kid off at school this morning, on the way home I played "Chicken" with a mallard and I lost......that little bugger just stood his ground and I had to swerve! Does he not know what a 2006 Suburban could of done to him??? lol

Now I just got back from picking same said child back up from the school and I will have to go and drop her back off in a few minutes.......(you don't wanna ask! trust me! lol)

Now Other child is late for the bus and I have to drive him......It's going to be one of those days! And to top it off, last night I dropped my curling iron into the toilet!!!! I loved that curling iron!!!! it 'sat' in there longer then expected, the first reason was I couldn't get over the fact that I dropped it in there in the first place, the second reason was it was still plugged in and turned first reaction was to stick my hand in there after it (knowing better!!!) then I stopped myself saying,"Ok Kim...what were you thinking??" so I just made a mad grab for the cord and yanked it out of the wall.

And did I mention that I woke up this morning to a recently deceased hamster in my freezer??? In the immortal words of the Beatles............"Strange days indeed!" and it's only 7:35 in the morning!

Good news is the DH slept in this morning, so maybe I'll get some breakfast out of all this! lol lol lol