In my entry below, I mentioned the story of playing crossing guard to possibly the worlds slowest turtle! So here it goes...
It was a late Sunday morning in the early summer, and I was out doing my weekend errands. I was driving down a road that I don't frequent much and then I remembered why. There is a large Catholic Church and Sunday mornings are very busy around there, it is only a two lane street and with Sunday Mass letting out, the wait in traffic can get insane.
So I am sitting there, biding my time and I see this 'LUMP' fall off the side of the road, from the curb and I realize it's a turtle. Now with all this traffic, I know for sure it will never make it across the street. So what does any other animal lover lunatic do? Why block the road both ways by turning her suburban sideways in the street of course! lol
I had just recently suffered an injury to my neck from my over joyous little boy who at the time was four. He kamakazied from the rear in an attempt to hug my neck and I ended up with whiplash! lol So here I am stopping Sunday Church traffic, trying to get to this turtle, so I can pick him up and put him in the grass on the otherside of the road. The trouble is with me being slow to bend because of my neck injury, every time I would get down to his level the lil bugger would just make it out of my reach.
You would hear his shell scrap across the pavement, then go "clunk" when he would pause for his next step. So it went like this........scrape..............clunk!............ scrape........... clunk! Until he caught wind of me that is! lol Now going at what he felt was warped speed it went more like this.....scrape..clunk! scrap..cluck!...scrape clunk!!! But he still managed to stay one turtle step ahead of me! lol
By now there were a few church goers laughing at me because they saw my intent, but I'm sure they couldn't figure out why in the world this turtle could out run my grasp. They couldn't because I wasn't wearing my neck brace any longer even though it smarted as hell to bend over and hang my head. The people in the first few cars could see why I was doing what I was doing but the other church goers a few cars back were now getting annoyed with me and letting me know it by blarring their car horns at me. Let me tell you it wasn't very Christian like if ya ask me considering they just left the place that just absoluted their sins right?
Well what seemed like and eternity which was probably 5 minutes from one side to the street to the other, the lil guy finally made it to the other side unharmed. He only needed a lil boost from me to get up over the curb on the otherside and we both went about our own business.
The rest of our day probably went something like this........
Me: A funny thing happened on my way to run errands today, there was this turtle........
Him: A terrifying thing happened on my way to the pond today, there was this crazy lady.....and I do mean CRAZY!
lol lol lol