Not a good day to be.....Me....(2)

OK, After I sat there patiently letting my SIL go over a few of my personality flaws..... while I locked and loaded. I cannot tell you how incredibly rude this woman is.....she offends people left and right and is not even aware of it, on a previous 'girls night out' she reduced my best friend to tears........She pointed out to my Girlfriend that her Husband is a looser and that in her opinion she wears to much make-up! I had to laugh at this one because this is a woman who powders her face several times a day, one layer on top of one layer, never without lipstick and wears eye shadow and mascara.........my best friend is like me, maybe we wear liner and mascara once in a while but that's is it. It was like Tammy Faye calling the kettle black! I spent the next day apologizing to my best friend and promising her that the SIL will not be joining us out again. I have never met a person who always says the most inappropriate things at the most inappropriate times. I wasn't the only person the SIL offended the other night...but will she remember?

By the end of the evening, we were actually turned away from a bar....at the door....because the bouncers said she was too intoxicated to enter......now that has never happened to me before and on top of it my SIL was insisting that she could drive the 12 miles back to her house, she couldn't even walk 12 steps and now I am seriously thinking about discussing with her (when she is sober) maybe a 10 step program might be in order. She doesn't casually drink, she drinks till she buzzes, and mostly in excess. I had to hold her by the arm just to get back to the cars and while I am searching through her purse for keys, the other girls strap her in the passenger seat, and they follow me to her house then return me to my vehicle........no matter how mad I am at her, she is NOT driving drunk! She did call me the next day and apologize all over again and thank me for driving her home.  I wonder how much of that night she remembers.

So since my 19 year old daughter and my SIL decided that...... that was the day to point out my flaws I thought that I should just lay them all out there, so no one will assume that I ever need to be told of them again.

I know I talk to much which sometimes leads to interrupting people, I am quick tempered, I am opinionated and articulate which means I can readily give my opinions, I am defensive (childhood issues I am always working on) I am stubborn (not my fault, I'm Irish! lol), I can be mean but I am never mean spirited, I only bring out mean when it is necessary and I need to work on being more tolerant and patient. There see.... I know my flaws........oh and did I mention....... I'm sarcastic??? lol lol lol

So in the end I know my flaws and I am working on them, I am trying to become a better me, I am ever evolving as I should be. I am a firm believer that you can say just about anything to anybody, but you have to always use tact and choose your time and place wisely. If you reverse every situation when presented with it, it gives you a better understanding of how to deal with it. I am old school about "treating people the way I want to be treated", but fair warning I am also old school on "do something to me once shame on you, do something to me twice shame on me"........I give very few second chances.....who knows maybe I need to add that to my list of flaws..........naaaaaaaaaa!

Not a good day to be.........Me

OK, criticism is good right? But when does one recognize deconstructive criticism from constructive criticism? They both still "smart" a whole hell of a lot!

If I am true to really trying on a daily basis to become a better me, I have to be able to handle my own personal.......good, bad and ugly. And then take some time to reflect on it and make changes or at least try to make the changes that I feel are necessary. Getting your good pointed out is a wonderful thing......getting your bad and your ugly pointed out is a not-so-wonderful thing. But I'm a big girl I can handle it as long as it's done with tact.

I had mentioned in a previous entry..within the last month I think about another run in I had with my Brother......the monster of my youth reared his ugly head for a few moments but the adult in me, who does not have the fear of the defenseless child, bit the monster back. I have no regrets with that situation, he did because he immediately tried to apologize and I wasn't in a very accepting mood.

While out with 'Dinner with the girls' which my Brother's wife is a part of a few days ago, after much dining and drinking and in the midst of the good time she brought the subject up. We discussed it briefly and both apologized to each other for each of our misconceptions of what took place.....I was there, she wasn't..... I thought that was the end of it. A little while later, after I had long switched to water but she continued to keep drinking, she decided it was a good time to start pointing out my flaws........in public, with other friends, among new acquaintances that we just met and I quietly told her this is not the time nor the place to do this........if she wanted to have this discussion at another time, and when she was sober I was all up for that, but not now......she agreed.

Well, after a few more drinks (her, I'm still sipping lemon water) she forgot about the agreement and let loose on me again.....I gave her fair warning....I told her she was just about to cross a line with me and that she really didn't want to do that with me, now the other girls were getting upset that the talk at the table was getting uncomfortable. SIL is now apologizing profusely but in her drunken stupor still continues a few minutes later.

OK, I know I talk a lot.......I am aware of that, I try to remind myself that I talk to much.....yes I am guilty of interrupting people from time to time,but group conversations are about the group conversing right? If I am rude and not aware of it, it's unintentional.......I know when I am intentionally being rude.....I think we all do. Well, I think it was about time I got intentionally rude with her. I tried to get her to 'table it' on several occasions.......she wouldn't so I thought OK, bring it on! I am NOT going to feel guilty because I can articulate how I feel better than most.....I know how I feel and I know how to word it.

I had spent that morning, having another knock down drag out with my 19 year old daughter, her story is still the same and I am still using the tough love approach....if it's working I am not privy to it. But I still believe if you enable your child you will have to do it their whole adult life.....and who wants to do that? It wasn't looking to be such a great day to be Kimberleigh.

Continued......

Went to a garden party ....finale

Now the hellcat that I was in my 20's would of probably knocked her out, and the woman that I was in my 30's would of just threw a drink in her face, but the woman that I am now......in my 40's just knew her life must be sorry enough that she had to go after another woman's man.....a man I knew she could never have.....but it was kinda fun to watch her try. I am sure her style has enticed other men.......but worry that my Husband might stray is something I don't have to think about, He is an honorable man, I wouldn't have settled for anything less.

The night was finally coming to an end and everyone was saying their good-byes and this was Elvira's most critical mistake........She had finally given up on cornering my Husband (again) about an hour before the good-byes started when she reached out to look at a piece of jewelry I had around my neck, which was an anniversary gift from my Husband a few years back and said to me as she was reaching to touch it,"That diamond is just gorgeous as well as the rest of your jewelry (What can I say! I'm a girly girl, I love jewelry.....diamonds are my catnip!) and I have been admiring them... all night!"  And this is when I quickly stopped her hand in mid reach and hissed, "That ain't all of mine you've been admiring all night honey......and just like my Husband, you can't touch this!"  And as I pushed her hand away I said,"Oh.... and by the way.......I don't wear..... underwear!"

Jim as well as my girlfriends almost spit the last of their drinks through their noses and I was quickly rushed out the door .......... What!!! I didn't hit her, I didn't throw a drink in her face, I didn't cause a scene and ruin the party for the host and hostess......I thought I was being nice about it too! lol I don't think Elvira and myself will be socializing at any more parties......Awwwwww!

It's nice to know that my Husband still has it.... even at mid life and he's mine all mine!

Went to a garden party (2)

OK, I've had enough of Elvira thinking my Husband is fair game, I pull him away for a moment and give him 'The Clue' since he didn't have one of his very own! At first he doesn't get it......grrrrrr! let me put it to you this way, Darling.......she wants you! He denies this then just grabs me and hugs the hell outta me......all of a sudden he breaks out in this annoying lil grin and asks me if I am jealous? Why do they assume right away we are jealous? I of course deny this and just explain that when another woman goes after another woman's man, that woman needs to be checked, kinda like they do in Hockey........I'm here to give her a check! He just squeezes me harder and almost giggles at the idea I am jealous! lol

Some time passes when My Husband seeks me out and says he thinks she's after him now too! Ok Sherlock, what was it that finally gave you that idea.........he said she cornered me in the kitchen along with another girlfriend of hers and started talking about her thong.....she literally asked him if he wanted to see it! Her friend then chimes in that he can see hers too..........she is also married, I met her husband too! I can read the head lines now........woman attacked and almost strangled with her own thong......news at 11!

I let that moment wash over me and then I noticed the look of panic all over my Husbands face.........Hmmmm wonder what that look is for......was it the thought of seeing this woman's thong or what was I planning on doing about it! lol I aksed him what happened next? he saaid he politely declined their invitation and that she even had the nerve to ask him if his Wife wore a thong......... AHAH! proof she did know who I was! lol I think it was at this point he thought it would be a good time to go home.........I said nonsense! the party seems to just be getting under way.......I walk off and go mingle myself!

I make my way over to the bar and refresh my drink and take my seat back at the table where my sister and my friends are.......I let them in on this latest development, just as my husband walks up to the table to take his seat by me in which my friends in unrehearsed unison ask him if he wants to see their thongs too!  He dies a thousand deaths while planning mine also I'm sure! What? This was too good to keep to myself! lol Poor Jim didn't stand a chance.........neither did Elvira!

Continued.............lol lol lol

Kristina's Writing Lounge Assignment

Kristina over at the Writer's Lounge as come up with her own version of  writing assignments.....I'm all for reading fresh views on even fresher topics. This weeks assignments is Ode to the School bus, write a poem on what that school bus means to you and share it with others......here is mine

The joy that yellow bus brings
I count the days until its arrival
and the first day of school
I happy dance into the house
hours..... glorious hours to myself
no one to scream "MAAA!"
from anywhere in the house

the computer is mine, the phone is mine
I even have total control over the remote
silence......golden silence
greets me in every room
coffee with the neighbors
lunch with my girlfriends
"Mom's Taxi" is not for hire

No one rummaging through a fully
stocked kitchen
while mumbling to ones self
"There is nothing to eat"
No one telling me they are bored
having time enough alone
to become bored myself

As much as I love to see that
yellow bus make its way down my street
it is the back of the bus that makes
my heart smile as I wave the children off!

kmh 2005

Journal Jar...Personality Traits

The Journal Jar
Subject: Question 76 ~ Personality traits
Author: promiseluv372
What personality traits do you admire the most?


This is an easy one for me........being comfortable with what you believe in and still be able to be open minded with other people.

I love to meet people who already know who they are. They have already been through the 'Finding myself' stage in life and are comfortable with what they have found, they don't feel the need to be different for the sake of being different. People who know who they are and like who they are. These are the people that know you have to continuously keep growing to be the best 'you' possible. A secure person is much more willing to accept others as who they are........there is no big ego trip to try and make others think the way they do........they know life is about learning and sometimes teaching others.

I know this is what I admire the most because it's opposite....close minded people......are what I detest the most.........I find them to be very stunted individuals..... what a pity.

Went to a garden party.......

Since my Husband does not wear a wedding ring of any sorts, he unintentionally gets mistaken for a single guy, now this does not bug me, I am secure in myself and I am secure in my marriage and hell, even at 46 he's still HOT! Just why is it, that men don't know when they are being hit on .......a woman can tell just by the way a man looks at her, long before he gives her his best come'on.....a woman just knows.

Now my Darling Husband doesn't seem to pick up on this, but I do......sometimes I sit back and watch how another woman, whether she be known to me or a complete stranger interact with my Husband......I can't help it, its part of my nature to study human behavior. Now any woman with a shred of decency knows to back off of another woman's husband, but for those few women out there who don't care to follow the rules of "This man's taken" will get their reality check.

I am not a jealous person by any means.......I don't fly off in a blind rage whenever another woman talks, flirts or checks out my husband. What I do have a problem with are the women who still throw themselves at him after finding out about me and the kids......A woman knows what another woman is thinking about long before a man does.

While at a party some time ago, I was introduced to a woman and her husband as she was also introduced to me and mine. I am a social person, I get along well with others and usually find fast friendships, and when I do meet someone that doesn't care for me I can tell they made up their minds prior to getting to know me first and most of the time it is a problem they have with themselves and not with me in general.....that has happened periodically through out my whole life..... It's old hat.

Now this woman is older than me,  probably somewhere around my husbands age even though she herself is married to a much older man. I begin to notice how she hangs on my Husbands every word, then I notice how she is constantly at his side, so much a girlfriend of mine who was also at this party, suggests I better go mark my territory, cuz somebody else is sniffing around! lol Normally I would, just in case the woman had mistaken him for a single man....but this woman and I were already introduced.....I'm thinking I'm not going to like her very much. While on my Husbands other side at dinner I hear her tell her Husband I know your tired honey, so why don't you just go on homeafter dinner and I will meet you there later, I want to stay and mingle for a little while longer...... he silently obeys her after dinner was finished and says his good-byes.

I join my husband outside for an after dinner cigar which I occasionally partake in once in a while and who comes out as if she is looking for him, why it's my Husbands new best friend.......let's call her Elvira for namesake ok??? ok! lol He still had no clue......I had a clue though something like Col. Mustard..... in the Library...... with a candlestick! lol Was I going to have to hose her down with the freaking garden hose or what?

Yup....you guessed it......continued tomorrow! lol