Cattails and Dorn Ü

                                  "Cattails"
                 

kmh 2001                

I am an avid reader of Dorn's Dust Bunnies and her photo journal Through the eyes of the beholder, many times we have left comments in each others journals sharing how we are drawn to shoot the same subjects many times over. We both agreed that if both of us were ever to be at the same place at the same time we would probably match photo subject for photo subject. I often tell her how jealous I am because living in Colorado gives her so many breathtaking shots and I am limited here in the burbs of Chicago as far as great nature photo shots, I am not drawn to many man made structures, my eyes are drawn to what Mother Nature has created for us. Dorn is creating some beautiful shots with her new camera and I am a big fan of hers........Ü

Dorns Photo Journal

Journal Jar Question 57

Journal Jar Question

What was the hardest thing in life learned?

Wow, what a question! LOL Since I've been stubborn born and raised all my life there were a lot of lessons taught the hard way, that it is only way I seemed to have learned them. I still have to learn most of my lessons in life the hard way, but at least now that I know that about myself, it makes taking all the lumps a little easier to stomach! LOL

But if I had to chose the one that I feel I learned the most from, was/is that I don't have to give 100% of myself, 100% of the time. That it's all right for me to be selfish sometimes and only expend of myself what I am willing to lose of myself, because in life it's not garanteed that you will always get back what you put out there.

I spent all my Pre-Momma days being much pretty self centered, I was the baby in the family, I pretty much got what I wanted in life as a child and as a young woman, things just went that way for me. It wasn't until I gave birth for the first time that I realized that I was not the center of the universe anymore, that I had just given birth to the center of my universe. I became this person who wanted to make everything good for everyone on this planet and I pretty much became a Yes person instead of the old, "who me?" person.

This not only drained me physically and emotionally, it also took from what was most precious to me..........my family. I over extended myself to others to help them with everything in their life that I was soon neglecting my own and my family, and the sad things is.....when I became the person that needed someone to lean on, no one knew how to deal with me, how could the person who fixed everyone else need to be fixed herself, they weren't ready to see me have a weak moment, so in the end it was only my family that was there for me when I needed to be the one helped.

I don't hold it against the other's (anymore) I learned that they can only give of themselves that they can afford to give to others and I had to adopt that philosophy for myself. It was OK, to say NO.........it was freeing to say...........NO! So learning the perfect balance of giving and holding back had to be the biggest lesson learned for me. Great Question Promise!!!!!

To read other Bloggers answers visit the Journal Jar

link~~~~>THE JOURNAL JAR

  

 

This is a picture taken of the sky right after a storm system passed through our area Friday night. It reminded me of what my youngest child, my son had said to me once when he was around 3 years old.  We were caught out in a storm in our car and the sky did something very similiar to this, he said to me, "Mommy do you see that?" and I said, "I sure do!" and said,"That's what God looks like mommy!" It was one of those moments where everything was right in the world for a brief  period of time, We all just watched as "God" shinned down on us for a few minutes. I Thought what a very profound statement to made from a lil 3 year old child.

This shot was taken while a bunch of us (friends and family) went to a local county stock car race, I hadn't been to the stock car races in about 15 years, I'm not fond of racing but my DH and my Son are die hard race fans even if its a local stock car race (they must be addicted to the fumes!) lol Little did I know that they were still looking for someone to start the race off by singing the National Anthem. What would the Mother of a 13 year old star in the making do? Why offer up her daughter to perform the national anthem for about 1500 stock car fans of course! As soon as the first note was out of her mouth you could of heard a pin drop, I always like to watch the crowd when she starts singing, they all look around at each other with their mouths open with disbelief that a voice like that came came out of a 13 year old girl! The applause at the end while she hit that last note and held on to it was almost deafening, they loved her! The announcer reminded the crowd again that she was only 13 years old and then he said, "I do believe we have the next American Idol in our midst people!" I of course had tears rolling down my cheeks! (I'm such a blubbering fool when ever she performs in public) She was invited back to sing anytime she wants too! YOU GO GIRL!!!!! lol

Saturday was spent out at the lake, we had a pig roast going on and I dragged out Rachel's karaoke machine for the night time festivities, the kids and even the adults had a good time sitting on the beach with a raging bonfire going all night and the smell of roasted marshmellow to make s'mores and great music!

Sunday was topped of with a pancake breakfast at the lake, and a kids talent show with performances including....A Saxaphone player, Oboe Players, Clarinet players, Singers and even some hulla Hoopers! We even had a magician scehduled to perform but I guess his nerves got the best of him and he bowed out via Mom. We then moved on to a horseshoe tournament, another big spread of food under the stars in the pavilion and another night of karaoking around the bonfire!

Now for today I think we are all going to spend it together again, just a lil quieter a lil slower.......maybe spend the day fishing....but then again we still have the karaoke waiting for us! lol lol lol

Until Next Time!

My Interview answers......wanna play?

1) What is the most important piece of advice you have taken either learned or heard? It came from my Mother when I was around 15 years old. She told me that If I relied on myself, I would never be disappointed, I held on to that and have found it to be true.
 
2) If you had to choose one hobby to stick with for eternity, what would it be and why? This is any easy one, it is my one going love affair with photography. You can capture so much with just the right shot, the perfect shot needs no words.
 
3) Is there anything in your life that you feel like you're in denial over? If so what is it? I think going through therapy taught me how to be honest with myself, I dealt with everything that needed to be dealt with, so I really don't think I have anything else to deny.
 
4) You have to relive two days of your life...one good and one bad...describe the days you choose. I think the good day would have to be the birth of my first child, it was totaly amazing to watch life enter this world through my body, I actually enjoyed labor and delivery, it was the nine months of pregnancy and  almost 5 months of morning noon and night sickness that I couldn't handle, I only had one shot of demerol at the end of labor right before delivery which took all of 4 minutes with each of my children. I was blessed. Now on to the hardest day, it would have to be with loosing a child, it's still to painful to go into details, I have yet to journal about it, but I am at the point where I can talk about it now, my regret was not dealing with it when it happened, I just closed myself off from it for a very long time, to the point where I couldn't keep it hidden in me anymore and it was one of the toughest parts of therapy, I think if I would of, if we would of talked about it, it might not have destroyed so much of me.
 
5) AOL has decided to cancel Journals. As a frequent user of this community; write a quick argument on why this is a poor business decision on their part. Its by far the best feature besides the the search engine itself. You cancel it and I take my business and my money elsewhere.....simple, direct, to the point!
 
In keeping with breaking up the monotony I have created this bonus question.
 
Bonus Question: What is your most favorite journal entry that you have wrote and why? All my favorite entries are dedicated to and are about each of my children and my adoring husband they all can be accessed quickly in the section at the bottom portion of the " other journals" section on the left of my journal......why my favorite? Because they celebrate my most treasured belongings, the things I carry around in my heart.
 
Okay now the rules...After answering these questions you must post them in your journal with a link to the journal of the interviewer. Then either leave a link back in the interviewers interview entry or email the interviewer that you have posted your answers in your journal. Then you must offer to interview five other people. You may use these questions or make up your own. If someone is interested in being interviewed by you all they have to do is leave a comment saying interview me or something like that.  

Anybody game? Email me or leave a comment and I will respond with my own set of questions.......thanks  Lioneyes4you!

Religion...now theres a tough subject!

Religion.....its a tough subject, one that can get fanatical at the moment someone does not agree with your beliefs. My mind is too open of a mind to believe in only one way for spiritual enlightenment. I get a lil annoyed with people who think their way is the true way, just because they have a book (Bible, Koran, etc.) to try and prove their case.

I do believe in a higher power and I am not sure if that is because it was drilled into my head as a child or because my soul knows this. I was never baptized and neither were my siblings, My Father was raised and schooled in Catholicism, My Mother was raised Protestant, they felt pressured from my Fathers side to have us kids baptized, but they decided to let us find our own religion if we chose to when we became adults, I later found out that my Grandmother (The Troll, fondly referred) took me and my siblings to have the Catholic Priest at their church to at least bless us, does that save me from burning in eternal hell? I don't know, I won't know until I get "THERE"

The intelligent side of my brain lets me believe in the theory of evolution, but the child in me that did attend bible school once in a while, believes in a higher power. Call it faith, call it blind faith but it's there embedded in my DNA somewhere. My Husband was also never baptized so we are following the same suit as our parents regarding our children and their spiritualism, we are letting them find their own guides in life. My children did and the last 2 still do attend "youth group" at a non-denominational church in my area, I offered it and they accepted it, I want them to continually grow as future leaders in this world, with better understanding of other peoples beliefs it makes it a lil easier to accept other peoples differences.

Do I believe in science....of course I do........Do I believe in miracles.......of course I do......do I pray.....of course I do......Do I believe in things I do not understand........sometimes and I am always willing to listen and learn from it but most of all I am willing to let you believe in what you want without passing any judgment on you......makes MY world a better place.

 

Until next time!

Rachel's Redneck Woman

This is Rachel singing Gretchen Wilson's "RedNeck Woman"

This is the song she had to learn for a friends wedding last summer, it was at this wedding that set the ball into play with lining up jobs after that. I still can't believe that big voice comes out of a 4 foot 9 inch, 90 pound ,13 year old girl!

"Wildflower" edited

 

 

Oh to be a wild flower
and dance in the wind
to feel the full sun
on me as I raise my face
up to the wild blue

To be chosen by someone's
beloved to be gathered
up in a lovers hand
to be given so freely and adoringly

To be pressed into a book
as a folded memory
to be experienced a new
with each turn of a page

Oh to be a wild flower

 

kmh 2005