Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Where my head is at today 7-24-07

So I show up at the hospital Saturday afternoon, they told me to completely medicate myself up myself up since I am going to be flat on my back which what causing me the most pain anyway.....they say take two Norco and to bring my liquid morphine......so I am comfortable, do I bring it? NOOOO! I forget it all at the lake...they wanted to know if I wanted to send someone to get it or have the Doctor order a new little prescription, nope lets just cowgirl up and get this over with.........well with being on the table for an hour and 15 minutes, I needed to be lifted off the table......my sciatica was killing me!

The spine came back with signs of cancer but Dr. Serious felt that treating all the cancer this time instead of just the spine would be the most beneficial so it was on to the new chemo...1 st week I receive both chemo's


Gemzar.com for Patients and Caregivers – Information About Treatment with GEMZAR for Non-Small Cell Lung Cancer, Pancreatic C... and CARBOPLATIN - INJECTION (Paraplatin) side effects, medical uses, and drug interactions.


 3rd week no drugs which works out great I won't have to worry about skipping vacation up north for a lil fishing which is a tradition we have been doing for years so I am very happy about that...so I have 1 week on one drug, second week on the second drug then I'm off the third week....hoping fanatically this one works! And waiting to see what side effects I get to enjoy with this one and how long they will last for, so far just a ton of confusion.


I want to send out my heartfelt feelings to you all for everytime I just need to vent or open my soul you lift my spirits so high and carry me, you make me feel that my time here on earth is not over yet, that I have things still left to accomplish and people left to inspire, what a gift to me you are all and I feel every hug, every good wish every prayer and it makes my soul soar so high to help the next person who needs that extra lift that I need from time to time and I love you all dearly for it.....I hope that there is at least one time that I was able to carry your troubled heart and make something a lil better for you...this world is a better place for those who sometimes walk besides us!


Love,


Kimberleigh

79 comments:

lmitc89854 said...

God bless you and keep you safe. Your spirit is amazing! Lindie

danpat923 said...

I don't know how I found you but I found you to be very inspiring and interesting.
I felt compelled to read more of your past journal entries.  I don't really know why you had to go to the hospital on Saturday but I figure it was for tests.
I am praying for you and also my best friend that just had her parnoid gland removed and they found cancer in the nerve.  She had breast cancer 5 years ago and we felt she was free.  You words are helping me understand her better and I thank you for that.
Good luck and please keep sharing your experiences.
patty

candlejmr said...

Just having you as a friend has made my life a little better.  You are 100% right.  You still have alot of things to accomplish and many more people to inspire.  It's only fair that EVERYONE get to experience your kind, loving and gentle soul.  I will be with you through this latest journey...always.

((hugs))
Jeanne

astaryth said...

Next time you see Dr. Serious... tell him that a bunch of us are counting on him to take care of you! {{{Hugs}}}

mutualaide said...

Kim, you have so much life to live and so much life to give.  Still here, fighting with you in spirit.  You inspire me each and every day .. to do a little better, to try a little more, to remember to be kind and compassionate.  And you totally, TOTALLY Rock!

princesssaurora said...

Oh!  I relate about the sciatica! OUCH!  You are totally not done yet, Kim... we all know that!!!  I am so glad that you have these two new drugs... Sending you big honking daily prayers for strength and cancer shrinkage....

Keep in contact with us as you can... Cheering you on to victory...

be well,
Dawn

ktkamanski said...

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gaboatman said...

Kimberleigh
I am amazed you opted to tough it out and get on the table without the meds.  You have my respect, Lady!  I am sorry there were signs of cancer on the spine.  I will keep you in my thoughts and pray that this series of chemo works and puts the cancer into remission.
Sam

inquestoftruth said...

Still praying.....
~Meg

am4039 said...

just you being you helps me. Your strenght your honesty during this very rough time in your life. Lots of love to you kim.

lifes2odd said...

You are always such an inspiration! Always have been.
Martha :-)

tendernoggle said...

Kim......since my husband died last Jan. , there have been very few things to lift my heart...but YOU have been my inspiration, and my hope that life does get better...You are and always will be my hero.
God bless you,
love ya,
carlene

canyonsun04 said...

Your so sweet, you just make me smile. I see so much of myself in you, the things you say, the way you are, the lake, fishing all of it. Your like my lil' extension of myself.
Keep on fighting, we will carry you to the finish line if we have to ;)
hugs
Ang

sugerb6 said...

Hang in there Kim. You continue to touch the lives of so many. Praying this new chemo will work and that the side effects are tolerable.
Love
Debbie

danica1023 said...

Kim, You are such a fighter.  Always know that you are never alone.  Sending hugs and prayers to you.  
Danica

dplkjl said...

Sometimes I just wander through life - living one day to the next and not really do much to help others.  Then a person comes along that is in the fight of her life (literally) and still has a spot in her heart to share her experience, hoping to help others.  It is people like you Kim that inspire and keep my hope in humanity alive and you make me want to do better.  If there was ever a time to concentrate on you it is now - and you are not only doing that - you are still thinking of everyone else.  I truly believe that for all the love you share - you get it back ten fold!  You have a lot of love out there for you and that along with all the medication and treatments are going to bring you back.  You are a stubborn girl - so go figure your cancer is stubborn - but my money is on you because I know you are going to do this and I know the doctors will find the right combo of treatments.  I hate that it is such a bumpy road - but I am so glad you are on it because you are on your way.  I think we are all blessed to be a part of your life! -Kelly

icewitch96 said...

((((KIM))))  Keep hanging in there, we all love and support you, and just want you to get better! You're in my prayers!

Love,

Jenn

deshelestraci said...

Kim, you are an amazing inspiration!  NO meds?!  That's tough stuff!  Which is what you are!  Blessings and prayers!
Traci

gandsbrock said...

When do you start the new chemo?  I'm glad you get a little break to enjoy some family tradition.  I think it's healing to get away from treatment every now and again.  You need it to keep up this battle.  Hang in there.  We're praying for you.
Stephanie

jckfrstross said...

you were very brave to lay flat for that long. i pray that this chemo kills all of the cancer in your body:) have a good hump day

Deb

malagutigrrl said...

Candles are burning ceaselessly. ;o)
You've been a huge inspiration to me.  I hope one day my fire is as bright as yours.

midwestvintage said...

Ouch on not having your meds but glad it is over.  Glad you get to go fishing.  That is good for the soul.  Take care.

               Julie

plieck30 said...

Rest on the trip and let everyone wait on you. No, being the determinded lady that you are I bet you wouldn't let them but you should. Paula

glensfork4 said...

I can't think of something to say.....there are so many thoughts in my head - so I am just going to continue to pray unceasingly.

Michele

dwhee70041 said...

Kimberleigh,
You are definately loved!  You are an inspiriation beyond belief.  We are all praying for your speedy recovery.  ((((HUGS))))
David

breakaway1968 said...

My prayers are with you :)  I hope you start feeling better real soon!  Will be reading again.  You are on my alerts now

sdoscher458 said...

(((Kim))) You are the friend that I never met and always wanted. You have lifted my spirit and soul so often during the last few years, you will never know how much.You were one of the first people here to say "hi" to me and you intriqued me with your writing about your life.   You have done that by being you, bearing your own heart, making us laugh, making us cry. You are a marvelous human being and you have touched many. Prayers are with you and your family. This new combo will work....love, Sandi

adlessor said...

You got a lot of spunk left in you girl.   Keep on fighting, you are loved and admired.    Sending hugs and prayers,       Dawn
http://journals.aol.com/adlessor/ACoupleofNomads

eilenbug said...

You are healing quickly. You are healing quickly.......

nelishianatl said...

You've always lifted me up and encouraged me.  I remember how you wrote me during my dark time a couple of years ago.  You cared.  I still remember.  Thank you for taking the time out to make a difference.

Nelishia
http://journals.aol.com/nelishianatl/WishingandHoping/

bvaneps834 said...

your journal always inspires me to do better and be better and to appreciate what I have so far. I think of you often and whisper a prayer for your healing!Barb

sybilsybil45 said...

Dearest Kim,  At least now you know what is in front of you again and we will all be here praying and sending all these good vibes your way and ready to pick you up on the days you feel down and fly with you on the days you feel well Keep going our dear Warrior.  Much much Love  Sybil xxx

lindaggeorge said...

You're getting there, I'm sure its that things were more advanced than anyone realised when you discovered your lump. Keep fighting.

You talk about going to the lake, well we had the lake come to us on Friday. Well, not so much a lake, more of a raging torrent! Have a look at the photos. At least we still have mains water. In Gloucestershire more than a third of a million don't and won't for at least two weeks. What is going on in this crazy world?

http://journals.aol.co.uk/lindaggeorge/GeorgeMansions/

Linda. xx

lazarai said...

Kimberleigh, I soooo hope this new stuff works for you!! You deserve a break, that's for sure. I don't know if you remember, but a couple of years ago, when I was planning a Chicago trip, you emailed me with info. I never forgot your kindness -- I was a complete stranger, after all, and you didn't have to write me. I have enjoyed your journal, your spunkiness, and your families' exploits for several years now.....and I want nothing but the best for you! Stay strong and keep fighting.

Hugs,
Carol

wwfbison said...

Praying this treatment plan works for you.  You are one tough cookie to have laid flat on your back without any medication.  Thoughts & Prayers always with you.
Lisa

ukgal36 said...

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pharmolo said...

That chemo is NOT going to be nice, Kim. I wish you strength with it. Meanwhile, I do hope it kicks the C in the butt and straight into the long grass. Keep your spirits high!

emabecmar said...

I always need someone to help me off those darn tables, or is it a bench cause they seem very small. (((((((hugs)))))))
Cindy

mpnaz58 said...

Kim, just knowing your spirit is strong lifts my spirit.  That is what you do for me...and I thank YOU!
xoxo ~Myra

katie39041 said...

You are an inspiration to all of us out here in jland. Your strength has shone through and we out here in jland will send you strength from around the world when you get a little tired.
God bless
love and hugs
Katie

inafrnz247 said...

We love you, Kim...  We are beside you all the way.

Hugs and Prayers,

Michelle

astoriasand said...

I walk beside you every day Kim praying thousandfold this new treatment kicks the S--- out of all that you are having to endure.You are the bravest woman I have met in my life and so deserve much better.Keep going Kim we are all with you girl. Love to all your family and prayers being said for them stregnth too .God Bless Kath
astoriasand http://journals.aol.co.uk/astoriasnd/MYSIMPLERHYMES

ajquinn354 said...

Kim, you know always that I'm thinking of you dear and hope that your treatment will be just the thing to better health for you dear.  Know I'm here for you always, if you need me for a hug, words, or whatever dear. Love, Arlene (AJ)

thinkingoutloud said...

You my friend are a gift to me.
Your strength is admirable.
You are MY Hero.

I'm glad you will get your summer fishing in.  That is something to look forward to.

Lots of love and prayers for you,
Niki

chat2missie said...

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rdautumnsage said...

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rgossett4195 said...

sweety, you aspire to be more like Jesus every day...it comes out in you words, you deeds and your actions.  TAke care, rose

ma24179 said...

You are very strong...get your head up. -Missy

ladyvictoriak said...

Good luck with the new treatment.  I hope and pray you have minimal side effects.
Viki

mztishgray0726 said...

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tellsg said...

Everything crossed here for you.  Hugs, Terry x

jmorancoyle said...

    Much love and much luck with the new treatment. You are always in my prayers.
Jude
http://journals.aol.com/jmorancoyle/MyWay

ajquinn354 said...

Kim, hope you are doing ok - miss not seeing you on-line.  Take care. You are always in my thoughts and prayers.  Arlene (AJ)

shoot4mephoto said...

Him Kim,
  I just wanted to send you a Great Big Hug from Maine!!! My thoughts are with you....
Love Lisa

randlprysock said...

Hello Kim,
I just wanted to say never give up and keep on praying!  God is in the business of miracles.  Hugs,
Lisa

helmswondermom said...

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heavenlybama said...

I wish you luck with your new treatment and pray that there will be minimal side effects.  Vent whenever you need to.  We all love you!
Hugs, & Prayers,
D
http://journals.aol.com/heavenlybama/journey-to-success

totallymentalben said...

Remember those lyrics John Lennon wrote? The ones that went, "In the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make." If you're feeling the love, Kim, it's because of your own ability to give it. To call you an inspiration does not even begin to describe it.

Now enjoy that fishing!

Ben
http://journals.aol.com/totallymentalben/better-left-unsaid

s0ngbird1962 said...

(((Kim)))  Have been thinking about you alot lately.  Praying that your new treatment will give you what the others have not, remission (for many many years).  Hang in there pink Warrior, better days are coming...

coelha said...

((((Kim)))))  I have been thinking about you.. I'm praying that these new meds are doing their job.  Hang in there!  Love - Julie

princesssaurora said...

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geminisolox said...

Thinking of you Kim... with much love from the UK... Gem xx

astoriasand said...

Popped by to say you are in my thoughts and prayers and all your family too Kim ,not just today but every hour of every day.Take Care God Bless Kath
astoriasand http://journals.ao.uk/astoriasand/MYSIMPLERHYMES

wildflowersea said...

Hi Kim,
Just stopped by to say hello :)
To let you know that I'm thinking of you. Hope to hear from you soon, through an entry. Take care,
~Annie

beckiepainton said...

hope the new meds are kicking the cancers butt!Take care, have fun fishing!Bekiex

bookncoffee said...

Good luck with the meds and I hope you enjoy the fishing trip.  Can I go?  I want to go fishing and no one around here in my family likes to fish.  LOL
Sonya

ashleekr said...

Love you, too - you are truly an inspiration - enjoy the fishing trip!
Ash

dplkjl said...

I'm thinking of you! -Kelly

tendernoggle said...

Hi Kim...just wanted to let you know that there is not a day goes by that I don't htink about you and say a little prayer for you...Hope this new medicine is working...Hope you have a great time on your trip!
love ya,
carlene

ajquinn354 said...

Kim, hope you have a chance to to touch base with all of us who care and love you dear.  You are in my thoughts and prayers always dear. Arlene (AJ)

faithmtn said...

I am hoping that things are improving for you physically and emotionally. Sending love & light your way and wishing you wellness!

chevyz71gurl74 said...

You are always in my thoughts and prayers Kim...
Keep fighting...never give up =)

Hope you have a great time on the fishing trip!

Hugs,
Terri

bmorrrick said...

Hi Kim,

You haven't left an entry in several days, I hope you're just resting and not in any pain.  I pray this new treatment will work, and you can be on the road to recovery.  Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers, as always.....

Love,
~Bilinda~

exptmircle said...

Just wanted to let you know I was thinking about you and praying you are feeling better.

adlessor said...

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cvgflydis said...

Just letting you know you are in my thought every single day and praying you are doing okay.

raeganfay said...

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littlelady1699 said...

hi kim

hope all is well with you....have not heard from you in a while...god bless you!

patty

http://journals.aol.com/littlelady1699/Whenlifegivesyoulemonsm/

pprrrr39 said...

(((((((((((((((((((((((( Kim))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))