Friday, December 15, 2006

Christmas Parties, Another "Telling" and an adult content warning! lol

Saturday is my Big Irish (extended) Family Christmas Party, and I can't wait to finally see all of them. Cancer has been very cruel to my family, One of my Aunts and one of my Uncles didn't win their battle and because of that everyone and I mean everyone is devastated that I was diagosed with cancer. For some (Hell most) of them they haven't even been able to see or talk to me. Even though I could of used the support I understand why they all find "seeing me" very difficult. It's all about comfort levels and I will not cross someone else's to appease my own.

So I am hoping that when they do "see" me tomorrow, they will see that I will survive cancer, and maybe they will stop thinking the next time they see me will be at my funeral. First of all I ain't a Funeral kinda girl.......hate them! My first funeral was my Father's and that destroyed me. I still go to funerals but it's not what I want for myself and forget about burying me.....not gonna happen any time soon or even when it is my time to go. Call me crazy but I want to be cremated, mixed with sparklies (lol) and tossed into a few helium balloons and left to wander where ever the four winds take me! lol I've always been one who loves a great adventure and I have suffered from wunderlust my whole life so why not continue with that even after death. My poor Irish Catholic Grandmother would have a fit if she even knew of my intentions after death! lol

It was my wish that My Grandmother not be told about my cancer, she will be 88 years old in February, she is the Matriarch and she has already experienced too much heartbreak in her life. She buried her Husband at the age of 31 and was left to raise her 7 children ( ages 15 and under) on her own and when she could no longer do it, she had no other choice but to have her family split up after they were accepted into Mooseheart. Click on this link to learn more about the "Moose Club" and Mooseheart ~~~> 
Welcome to Mooseheart - The Child City . She buried her first born Son (My Father when he was only 41), she buried her first Born Daughter ( 52,Cancer) and then she Buried her second born Son (55, cancer) That is the hardest thing a Parent will ever have to do....burry one of their children and she has buried 3 out of 7 plus one of her 18 grandchildren, the 31 year old Son of the Uncle I lost to cancer. So I do not want to put that woman through more heartache then she has already seen and I don't want her heart to be heavy with what I am going through.....who knows maybe when I am finished with chemo and I get the "all clear" from the Doctors I might let her know then and she can see for herself that cancer isn't always a death sentence. I come from a long line of strong woman and now you can see where some of it comes from.

It is from her that I also get my very raunchy and wild sense of humor......My fathers whole side of the family "suffers" from it! lol Gramma Annie is the one that I get all the "TELLINGS" from, stories past down from one generation to the next and I come from a wild bunch let me tell you! It has always been with a lively sense of humor that we have survived many challenges and boy am I glad that humor is a big part of my DNA! lol lol lol

Now for another "Telling" WARNING!!!!!! Not for the delicate ears so click out now if you are easily offended. LOL LOL LOL

Now Gramma Annie is the Mother of 7, The Grandmother of 18, The Great Grandmother of 27 and Great Great Granmother to 1 and while at a Family Christmas Party of few years ago....I had a quiet moment with her and I had always wondered but never asked, why she never found anyone else (after my GrandFathers passing, now remember she was only 31 years old!) to spend the rest of her life with. There were never any men around while I was growing up and I do know of a man that she met a few years after my Grandfather died but way before I was even a twinkle in my Fathers eye....She was maybe 35 and dated him for awhile thinking the whole time he was single only to find out that he would no longer be able to see her because he had lied to her and that he was married and his wife was about to be released from (what they referred to back then) the Insane Asylum. But after him there was never anyone else.....so I asked her "Gramma after all these years why didn't you ever fall in love again or did you just not want to? Wasn't there ever anyone special? You've been alone for over 50 years? Didn't you want love again?...........and her answer to me (Now mind you I am expecting this love story kind of answer, about loving only one man my Grandfather, and that every man after him paled in his shadow....you know a story that I could share with the great grandchildren and future generations) and her answer went something like this.........(finale warning adult content)

"Well, Kimmy all my life I was looking for a man with a thick wallet and no dick and all I kept finding were men with thick dicks and no wallets!" Now I about fell outta my chair....this was an 80 something year old woman....all I could mumble after all my chit's and giggles stopped was, well that's another story that can't go down in the family story book but can be shared with the rest of the family when they have reached adulthood themselves! Now me and the rest of my adult siblings and cousins got a kick out of it, but her adult children were not amused!!! lol lol lol

Now are some of us gonna burn in hell? Probably but it will be one hell of a party! lol lol lol


There are other "tellings" somewhere in my archives you are more then welcomed to find and enjoy reading them!


Gramma Annie now suffers from macular degeneration so she will not be able to tell by looking at me that I have been ill.

23 comments:

mikev009 said...

Your grandmother sounds great.  A good attitude in life will take you far.  ~ Mike

mumma4evr said...

your granmother sounds like a hoot!!!  My husband's grandmother was one too!! She would always ask me if I was pregnant yet.  I would say no and she would say iwth a gleam in her eye, " I hope it isn't for lack of trying.  And if he takes after his granfather, I know you are one satisified woman!"
Becky

missheathyrmaree said...

ha ha ha ha.
Your Gramma knows what she is talking about! ha ha.
I hope you have fun at your Christmas party :]
Hugs,
Heather

lanurseprn said...

HA HA HA OMG this 'Telling' was so funny!!  Your family sounds great!  Can I come visit??
Pam

imshadowraven2 said...

I wasn't surprised of grams response to your question after all she is your family.....lol Have a great time tomorrow and show them all just how alive you really are.................love u much Robin

thisismis72 said...

Love your telling story's,   Ganny Annie sounds like one tough but sugary sweet lady, Have a great night and a wonderful weekend.
Missy

gandsbrock said...

Okay, that one had me ROFL!  I'm gonna have to dig around for more "tellings".  We do have something in common.  My mom came from a large family of 12 kids and they were very poor, so when her father died, the underage kids had to go to the children's home.  Grandma's been gone for many years now, and I don't think she had any men folk at all (no one's telling!) - the only unusual thing I remember about her was she dipped snuff.

Have a great party!  Are you going to go bald, wig, scarf or Santa hat?

chat2missie said...

h

sjnunn340 said...

sounds like a blast a party full of the irish make sure u partake in a tipple of baileys for me.

I love the idea of getting cremated with sparklies and let free sounds fantastic.

Your gran sounds fantastic

http://journals.aol.co.uk/sjnunn340/ups-and-downs-of-life

stacey xxxx

sangrialel said...

I am laughing so hard!!!!  I can just imagine what the look on your face must of been like!  Linda

onestrangecat said...

I never asked my grandmother why she never remarried.  Now I'm glad I didn't.  LOL

Kathy

ajquinn354 said...

Oh Kim, your story on your Grandmother had me rolling on the floor - her answer was a real winner.  Yes that isn't one you can list in the family history books for all to read - but really it should be, will give everyone a laugh and they'll realize what a "hip" lady she was.  I love it.

Have a wonderful Irish Family holiday get-together....bless you....Arlene (AJ)

chevyz71gurl74 said...

OMFG....i am rollin over here....hahaha
Your grandmother...what a hoot!
Your family sounds alot like mine...
we all have crazy, fun and wild sense
of humors.... =)~
Thanks so much for sharing that...
and i hope you have a wonderful time
at the party....don't forget to take pics!

Hugss..~Terri~

jmorancoyle said...

    If Grandma Annie were to find herself in hell, it isn't because she didn't tell the truth! What a wonderful story.
Jude
http://journals.aol.com/jmorancoyle/MyWay

happysunshien said...

lmao....omg i almost wet my pants...cause that sounds like something my big mamma (grandma) would say and then giggle...lmao....

kelly

siennastarr said...

h

astaryth said...

I LOVE your Tellings, and this one was no exception! Your Gramma Annie reminds me of my mother... My brother and I always fear (and sometimes cringe) anytime the kids will ask her a question cause she is sure to tell them the truth.... and heaven's knows our lives weren't always normal <g>

lmitc89854 said...

God bless you and your Grannie

sdoscher458 said...

I love old people with character.  My own grandmom was such a one...she was well into her 80's and one time we went to a Mall in Norfolk, she went to sit on a bench while myself and others looked for shoes. I turned around and she had "picked up" a little ole man..sitting next to her..flirting to beat the band! Loved it...she told me in her "southern way" that she admired the attention of a real gentleman and always had. LOL....Sandi

thegirlnexdoor77 said...

Your Grandma is  a hoot!  LOL...Hugs,TerryAnn

peggy111061 said...

Your grandmother is hilarious and quite honest.  Just as you are!  I wonder how many other women out there feel the same way about the men folk as your grandmother?  lol

plieck30 said...

Finally got here to read this funny entry. I might add just because a man has a fat wallet doesn't mean he will give you any of it. Paula

csandhollow said...

I would love to meet that woman!