Quick Update

I had my 2nd round of Chemo this past Tuesday....a lil more queasy this time, Wednesday was spent quiet because chemo took my voice again, Thursday I slept most of the day.....hopefully because I won't be taking the Compazine (another anti nausea med) I should have a better weekend than the first round of chemo. I think I will spend most of today napping on and off too.... at 43 I am learning to rest when I need too and I take full advantage of the days when I am unstopable.....those days feel good....they build me up for the down days that come with the chemo.....but all in all and with many thanks for the cancer patients that have walked this path before me, I am doing awesome! I no longer fear Chemo, I am one of the lucky ones that is handling the side effects very well and for that I am grateful beyond words.

 

I'm shedding more now but you still can't tell I'm loosing my hair so I will keep it for a while longer. I am already done with half of the bad chemo treatment (The CA chemo cocktail) 2 more rounds of that and then on to the  tamoxifin (4 rounds of that too) my last chemo date should be January 2nd, then 2 months after that I should be ready for my final surgery. Yipppeeeee! lol

 

For now I am finished seeing the Surgeon and the Plastic Surgeon until after the new year.......happy that I get to cut back on the Doctor visits. Now I just see The Cancer Doctor for chemo one day, a white blood cell booster shot the next day then only a lab visit the following week. At least my second week in between the chemo visits are good ones.......and because of the throat infection right off the bat after my first round of chemo, my Oncologist will have me do a five day run on antibiotics starting every 6th day after chemo. The most important part of chemo is getting it on time every time, I can't afford to get sick and get off my chemo schedule. And another unforseen blessing is I feel almost as good as I did before diagnosis by the middle of the second week. What a relief to actually feel like my old self for a whole week!

 

Chicagoans are doing the Breast Cancer walk this weekend..... Imay not be up for it this year, but you can bet I will be walking next year...decked out in PINK of course! lol lol lol

 

Love,

Kimberleigh

What Cancer Cannot Do

What Cancer Cannot Do

Cancer is so limited.....
It cannot cripple Love
It cannot shatter Hope
It cannot corrode Faith
It cannot destroy Peace
It cannot kill Friendship
It cannot suppress Memories
It cannot silence Courage
It cannot invade the Soul
It cannot steal eternal Life
It cannot conquer the Spirit

Author Unknown

Just Happy to be here........Ü

Like I stated in a few earlier posts....I had no problem having a complete radical mastectomy (click link to see exactly what that is ~~>)  Radical Mastectomy  of my left breast due to the cancer. My feelings were that if it's trying to kill me why would I want to save it. Having 3 tumors plus a large mass of small ones forming I had no other choice if I wanted to live.....plain and simple.

Selecting the Tram Flap reconstruction was harder on my body then building up the space behind the muscle in my chest wall to later place a saline implant....but it was the fastest way to get the result and hey I had enough donor tissue (Tummy lol!) to make a new boob and now I have a new boob and no tummy............BONUS! lol lol lol  For an eight hour surgery recovery tough but I was never more than uncomfortable and I was out of the house at the lake just 11 days later.  Ü

And as I also stated in an earlier entry it was the Chemo that I feared the most.....not the surgical knife. So with one dose of Chemo under my belt (2nd one this coming Tuesday) and six more after that I am extremely blessed to say...........PIECE OF CAKE!!!! lol The chemo day itself was no different (except for a few tears) than the days before chemo, even the next two days I felt fine thanks to the strides they have made with dealing with the nausea. I would have to say the 4th and 5th days were probably my roughest but I think that was from the 3rd drug that was supposed to help with the nausea. The 6th and 7th days I slept a lot and after that I have been back to my normal self. I have been feeling awesome ever since and I am THANKFUL!!!!

So here I sit saying that even with cancer come blessings and for me a few perks! lol I will have the body back that I had before children (perky boobs and no tummy!) My hair may come back either thicker of if I am lucky with a few curls to it. I know exactly how much I am loved by people that I love in my life, I will yet again set my own personal standards higher at living even a better life, and I hope that through this blog and the way I am dealing with my own battle with Breast Cancer that the next person who gets that news has a few less fears and see's that not every diagnosis is a death sentence. You battle hard you can win the victory!

I want to thank all those that are walking this weekend for a cure, I am honored that some of you have added my name to your list of who you are walking for, I am humbled for every dollar that has been given this month of October for breast cancer awareness for my sake and so very thankful for all the encouraging comments left for me in this blog and the love you have shown for me and my family.....you, the people reading this blog are the ones that are truly inspirational to me.

Thank You All!

Love,
Kimberleigh

A few revelations

A few revelations that have washed over me when I wasn't even looking......

I never want to drink or even smell Ouzo ever again.....and another libation referred to as 'Snake Bite' (it bites alright and you feel the sting for hours! lol) The Ouzo revelation was brought upon finding another journal and it reminded me of a night long ago spent with Ouzo and some friends! lol

I finally realized that if someone wants to be acknowledged by God, then one should start acknowledging God (This by no means I am becoming a Holy Roller or Bible Thumper, I personally think religion should be a personal, one on one thing with God.)

When I'm feeling a lil icky, peanut butter and jelly on toast is still a favorite comfort food.

I am no longer fond of the smell of eucalyptus leaves or lilies any longer.......ok and I have to add dill pickles to the list now too!

I have always been keenly aware of how I feel about other people in my life, what I never knew until now was how much I mattered to them......that's a really great feeling.

And last but not least, even though I spent the last few years really trying to live a life worth living and I gained a lot more compassion for the world around me, and I stopped taking life for grant it.....I learned I could still be a lil more grateful and count more blessings and that would make an even better....... me.

Channeling James Brown...."I FEEL GOOD"

I'm having such a great day! A REAL GREAT DAY!.....so great that I may have to add a day so good that......dare I say out loud that I feel as good as I did before Breast Cancer rocked my world..........yup that great of a day.

So what did I do this great day so far.......ventured outside to see that Autumn has arrived.....the prettiest season of the year....called up an old best friend and belly laughed at some of the "LUCY AND ETHEL" moments we used to get ourselves into......(LOVED THAT....NEEDED THAT) I even did some laundry...I know not sooooo exciting to some (Ok! Many!) but for me to want to do laundry and have the energy to strip down my bed and make it all back up again is a miracle.......I think I am almost giddy with feeling good....and no I am NOT stoned! lol lol lol no nausea meds since Monday night....yeah for me!

I think waking up in clean sheets tomorrow might even carry over my good day into tomorrow....2 good days in a row will be indeed a blessing. Only side effect I am battling now is the fatigue....like napping is hard or something! lol

I just wish I would get a slightly stuffy nose ( Lots of things smell bad to me right now), I should be a professional "Sniffer" for a wine or perfume company.....my nose is excellent even if it is what I hate about my face the most! Almost want to whisper into Dr. Hollywood's ear......"PSSST Doc....when you are lifting the old girl and working on your magic to make the new girl which resembles more of a butt cheek than a boob right now(No nipple, no areaola) can you accidently (of course) drop some kind of medical gadget on my nose and then make it pretty??"" A girl can dream can't she???

I think I am going to my oldest daughters house tomorrow afternoon with my middle daughter so they can buzz the rest of my hair..I'm tired of shedding! lol So I think the girls and I are going to have some kind of ritual to the old and welcome on the new me that will be emerging when all is said and done. Loosing your hair is not so scary when you not cancer is in charge of it's final absence....knowing it will grow back helps too! I was humbled yesterday watching the "Tyra" show and she had teenagers who have Alopecia (click to learn more about it ~~>)  National Alopecia Areata Foundation a disease that one forever looses ones hair.....remembering myself as a teenager I realize the devastation that must have brought to their lives.

Who am I to shed one tear for hair that will come back and in the meantime will symbolize.... I'm kicking cancer's ASS!

 

THINK PINK!

10-03-06

I slept most of the day away....hard to believe that I am already 7 weeks post up and have one chemo under my belt. I am battling some kind of throat infection already....no antibiotics until my fever reaches at least 100.5........doesn't matter that my core body temperature is normally 97.2 as with my kids. So in order to be put on antibiotics I have to have a 3.3 spike in my temperature when other people with a normal body reading of 98.6 only have to have a 2. spike in fever. I did go in yesterday to the lab to have my blood checked as far as readings go for white blood cell count and red blood cell count......Oh the fun I am having! lol

Sunday was a good day.........I had to get out of the house, when I want a normal day I go to the lake....sunshine, friends, family and a cook out makes a normal day for me....it felt good to be out. I did have to go in and lay down for a bit, but my nose got the best of me once the grill was started up and I can't pass up a good potato salad. I have to have a taste for something or it fights me.....taking me back to my pregnacny days....I'm hoping I don't crave what I craved back then....bologna folded like a taco shell filled with whip cream.....I know gross! lol lol lol With my baby girl, Rachel....the only thing that stayed down for the 2nd, 3rd and 4th month was a large order of McDonalds french fries dipped in their hot mustard sauce....I think it's the salt that soothes my stomach.

I would love to hear some "Out There" cravings from a few of you! We can either get a good giggle out of it or ruin our appetites for the rest of the day! lol lol lol.......Hey! What are friends for anyway??? lol

I saw Dr. Hollywood last week, he is a lil concerned about a few spsots that are slow to heal on the "NEW GIRL" He asked me if I was upset about it's progess......I reminded him, that all I asked of all of my Doctors was that they help me to battle this Breast Cancer so I can finish raising my last two babies....and anything that comes after that is "NOTHING BUT GRAVY!"

Being Tumor Free, soon to be cancer free........ trumps all the lumps and bumps that will be there to remind me of my battle fought hard and victorious!

Is it to soon to whine?? lol

I am in such a drug induced haze....I feel as if I am the subject of a Jimi Hendrix lyric. I had to stop taking the drug Compazine.....just saying the word makes me want to vomit. The side effects are/were unreal. They were supposed to stop nausea...how can it stop nausea when one of it's MANY side effects are blurred vision? Who doesn't get nauseous when experiencing double vision?

IF this post makes sense to one person then I truly have amazed myself. I have done nothing but sleep 18 hours a day for the last 3 days...the urge to close my eyes and sleep where I sit, stand or lay is so intense. I almost fell asleep standing in front of the microwave waiting for my oat meal to cook.

Food another nauseating thought...but I feel weak if I don't eat and then again the vicious cycle of nausea starts again. 3 more drug combo's for this round of treatment and at least the nausea and the fatigue will go away. The last 4 treatments of the chemo drug 'Taxol' (I think) the only side effects of that are, muscle and joint pain....I can handle pain.....I have a high threshold of pain....I'm probably the only woman out there who LOVED labor and delivery....no epidurals for me....get me to 10 cm and one shot of Demerol and I'm good. lol So I'll take the pain over the intense nausea, fatigue and dizziness of the first half of my chemo cocktail.

I just want out of this foggy feeling.........sorry to complain, but I can't seem to stop myself today!